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  • Author Honey Badger

Grief and Rising


Missing the innocent girl, I was

Miss the trusting girl I was,

I miss the girl who chased her dream to serve her country

Thinking that the six guys and chain of command had killed her,

Just go through the motions

Afraid to trust

Afraid to feel


Dissociate because that is what she was taught

Sometimes I have thought,

“why did you not fight them and make them kill you,

why did you just lay there, why did you not jump

when you had the chance”

Sometimes I have wanted to get rid of this

body, to hide this body

so that men would not look at me or hurt me again


But the belief it happened because of what I was

wearing and that

I was too drunk came

from society, not me.

It is time to unlearn everything

that society has taught me,

Time to learn to feel, to stay

present, to cry, to be

angry, to laugh, to sing,

to dance, to dream, to tell my truth.

I am learning every day that


there are more threads to me

That I have been rising and changing,

rediscovering who I am

becoming who I want to be

putting the broken pieces back

together and becoming an arrow

continuing to rise into the light.

Shining light on the things that I have never

told anyone letting go of old habits, old ways of doing things


I will become who

I want to be and the world is going

to hear me, ROAR!!

I will speak my truth, and they will hear me.

I do not care what they think

No more excuses!

No more abuse

I am back!

I have the

little girl back.


She is stronger

She is beautiful.

Yes,

she is changed,

but she is complex, caring,

compassionate, understanding and she is faultless


She has brought with her:

Patience, Truth, Anger, and Empowerment

She is not alone and together we will rise.




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