A poem Written on January 24, 2014
Enlisted to serve my country
to chase a dream
To be part of something bigger then myself
That has the core values
of Honor, Courage, Commitment
That fight the enemy and have each other’s back
I was raped by a third class petty officer,
A crime was committed against me and
Once I made that report I was treated like
I was the one that had committed the crime.
I was told that I was nothing,
That the Uniformed Code of Military Justice did
Not apply to me and
it meant nothing.
I was told that I was lying about what had happened,
That I was the one that had a problem because I was
Drinking and that somehow gave him the
right to rape me,
I was retaliated against and my career was over,
I tried my best to deal with the emotional abuse
and institutional abuse
But that caused me to hate myself that much more,
I started to get into a deep depression,
I started cutting and burning myself to deal with
the emotional pain
That I was feeling.
I had nowhere to go,
There was no way to get away
from the chain of command
That was abusing me even more
They added even more layers of pain, rage, grief, to
The trauma that happened to me.
I know that no one cares.
That no one will listen.
Everyone is protecting
the bastard that raped me
I feel like why did I not fight him and made
him kill me,
Wait, I couldn’t have fought him
because I was intoxicated,
Had passed out from drinking.
I woke up to him being on top of raping me.
The chain of command does not care
They sent me to anger management and wonder
Why I have become even more angry
A crime was committed against me
He forced himself on me
I feel betrayed by him and
the chain of command
Been told over and over and over again I mean nothing.
I am nothing but a walking mattress that deserved to be raped.
We only care about protecting the bastard that raped you
The Uniformed Code of Military Justice and laws mean
Nothing when someone is raped.
We will ruin your career,
Promote and protect the rapist that raped you
And send him to another command so he can continue to rape